Back to School and Getting on Schedule September 12, 2012

Ahh yes, back to school time… G started last week and he loves it!  It’s only two days a week, but he is already learning so much and it’s nice for L and I have to have some one on one time.  Starting back to school also means getting back on a regular schedule and a not so “lazy summer” time frame.  Most mornings we are up and out the door by 8:45, which I know isn’t super early, but without our routine we never get anywhere.  So I thought I would share how we made on transition from lazy summer to busy fall schedule.

I made a VERY BASIC printable schedule to keep me on track at home. The weekly list is what helps keep my head above water on the days I feel like I might drown in to dos.  I list my errands, workout schedule, kids activities, work info, to do list, and daily chores all in one place.  Under the To Do section you will see 5 10 15 I write the task next to the numbers, this way I do each task for the allotted about in time then cross it off.  For example if clean out refrigerator is on my to do list I take five minutes and do as much as I can then cross out the five and go on to the next task.  I do this all week until all my tasks are completed!  My daily chores have the days of the week next to them so I can cross them off as I go as well.  Easy peasy, right?

To make G’s life more easy I picked up a weekly calendar at Target for $2 and stuck it to our fridge.  Next I used the cards I had printed, laminated, and stuck magnets on from Confessions of a Homeschooler and wa-la he had his own weekly picture planner!  Now he can find the day of the week and know what we are doing without having to ask.

Even with both those ideas in place life doesn’t always go according to plan… we are doing our best, one step at a time!

What have you done to get ready for the Back to School season?

 

Labor Day Virtual 5 mile Recap September 5, 2012

Yesterday I ran my first ever virtual run!  Laura from Mommy Run Fast was nice enough to organize the whole race for FREE.  I was also lucky enough to be able to run it with a member of my local Moms RUN This Town Chapter (Hi Angela.)

We met up at 9:45 yesterday, it was really not the best day to run… it was 80 degrees and 100% humidity, but we were going to do it!  Pushing our strollers weighted down with toddlers, drinks, toys, sunscreen, and enough snack for an army we made our way for a flat 5 mile run.  Before I go any farther let me tell you I am NOT fast, I consider my self a runner and I have no shame in walking when I need to.  We ending up taking to short walk break before the 4.5 mile point, but ran most of it feeling hot, sweaty, stocky, and glad to be out running together.  At the 4.5 mile point we stopped to let our kids get out and play at the playground, because that’s what you do when they are both screaming and trying to climb out of the jogger!  After a few minutes it was back to the pavement to complete our last half mile, when finished in 1:14:10.
It wasn’t an easy run for this Momma, but it was made easier by running with a buddy, someone to keep me going when I wanted to stop.  That’s another reason virtual races are so great, you sign up then you are committed to run the distance!

If you’re looking for some running pals checkout Moms RUN This Town they have chapters all over the country!  And please checkout Laura’s Blog Mommy Run Fast for some great motivation to keep running or start running!

Taking Care of Mom August 28, 2012

Last night after getting both kids bathed and into bed I came downstairs looking ragged and worn out.  I looked at my husband and said “I am so exhausted.  I haven’t been this exhausted since… well, I guess yesterday.” And that about sums up my life as a stay at home mom to 2 kids under the age of 3.  I always feel tired.  Being a parent (working outside the home or stay at home) is hard and it’s tiring!

My wonderful husband’s response was “go to bed.”

He was right, I needed to head to bed and catch an extra hour.  As he said the words my brain was going on over 6 page to do list.  I dragged my sorry butt to the kitchen to finish my nightly routine and most importantly get my coffeemaker ready for the morning.  I was surprised to see my husband standing in the door way when I turned around.

“Go to bed.”

“I will I just have a few thing to do.”

“Like what?”

“Make coffee, cut coupons, feed the dog, pack snacks…”

“Go to bed.  None of that is important.”

“Coffee is important.”

“I will take care of it, all of it.”

I don’t know if more wonderful words have ever been spoken.  At that very moment I remembered why I loved my bossy husband.  He just tells it like it is.  Truthfully packing snacks and cutting coupons did not need to be done right away.  My husband knows that I get side tracked and start working on little projects around the house and before I know it it’s midnight (in fact I am typing this at 9:34 pm and he has ordered me to bed by 10.)

I don’t know what happens to a woman when she becomes a mother.  Something changes… You get these strange super powers like being able to function on less then 4 hours of sleep, or carrying heavy loads like an infant carrier, 3 bags of groceries, a diaper bag, and a screaming toddler.  These super powers are awesome but eventually these changes cause us to stop taking care of ourselves.  The past 3 months have been eye opening for me, seeing what really matters and trying to let go of what doesn’t.  Last night I was so tired, tired because I had been ignoring my bodies signals that it needed more rest and better nutrition.  I got my 9 hours of sleep last night and woke up feeling like my Almost Super Mom self, so good that I headed to the gym for a run.  What?  A run and a good night’s rest all within 24 hours.  How does that happen? I know, I know, I am super lucky to have my husband to help keep me grounded.

For the month of September I am really focusing on what I can do to take better care of me.  I started a journal (Shawn at Awesomely Awake gave me the idea, but her’s is a bit different than mine) to help me unwind.  Each night I take 5 minutes to write about my day, exercise, nutrition, rest, what we did, and general recap of the day.  After that I list Good/Bad/Need Work, it’s nice for me to see stuff that was awesome, stuff that didn’t go so well, and stuff I need to work on.  It’s just a list, so I can get it out of my mind by writing it on paper, and it has really helped!

What areas of self care are you lacking?  Do you journal?

Busy Mom’s Guide to Joining a Gym August 15, 2012

We all want to be fit and healthy, I mean no one ever says “I can’t wait to eat garbage and feel fat!”  I have written a few post about working out and how I fit it into our routine.  The best advice I can give is to join a gym that ACTUALLY fits your needs.  Before signing on the dotted line read my 3 steps to finding the right gym for you.

1. Find a gym that you can afford!  It sounds so easy, right?  But if you aren’t careful many gyms have long contracts or expense sign up fees.  Be sure to ask about discounts based on income.  Many gyms also offers savings if you pay in advance or use a checking account and set up an automatic payment.
2. Location, location, location.  As parents our time is limited as it is so adding long drives just won’t work. The gym need to be close to your home or work place.  If you have to drive 30 minutes each way to get there you WILL NOT go.
3. Childcare.  This is the most important step for me and most stay at home moms, someone has to watch your kids while you workout!  There are plenty of places that offer free or cheap childcare. This is the one option I am willing to pay more for.  I can’t workout early because my Husband leaves at 4:30 am for work and by the evening I am too exhausted to thinking about going to the gym.   Be sure to check the hours of the childcare room, some places are only open for a few hours a day; if you can’t make it during those hours it isn’t worth paying extra for.

Of course there are other things to consider when searching for the perfect gym, but these are the top 3 for busy Moms.  Also important to note that a gym membership does you no good if you never go, don’t be afraid just go!  Trust me no one is staring at the new girl! (Or maybe they are because you’re Smokin’ Hot!)

Everything I know I learned from a Horse July 24, 2012

I often feel discouraged as I am trying to wrangle my kids, like maybe I have lost my touch or something.  I used to be able to make 1000 pound animals obey with just a stern look or or light pressure to a shoulder.  What happened?  Why was working with the big beasts so much easier then working with my small beasts at home?  The reality is that training horses isn’t much different then raising children!

Horses and children have basic needs for food & shelter, exercise, rest, routine and love; without meeting these needs you are stuck dealing with an angry beast.  (Or in my case two angry beasties!)  So simple right?  But how do you meet them all everyday?

Food and Shelter

It’s a basic need of … well just about every living thing.  I would have never feed my equine athlete any less them the best performance feed I could afford, so why would I feed my kids processed crap all day.  I have notice how much happier my children are when they eat real foods for 90% of their diet.  We do have the occasionally ice cream or fruit snack and I won’t deny them of that… the same way I would feed my horse a treat after a good day.  Shelter for horses is definitely different than it is for humans, but the basis is the same a safe place to live.

Exercise & Rest

Everyone know that kids need exercise, but I think we sometimes forget how important it is.  If you have ever seen a horse being lunged to “Get his kicks out” before he is worked then you totally know what I mean.  Lunging a horse is his time to stretch his legs before you get on and out him to work.  Lunging is also used to exercise a horse if you are not able to ride him.  I lunge my kids before we sit to do any kind of craft or book activities, it give them a chance to get their sillies out before we need to be still and focused.  Resting is huge for both children and equine, if given enough time to rest you will have happy horses and kids.

Routine

What can I really say about routine?  It is so important to have a daily routine to stick with. Horses and kids fuction best with routine.  Knowing meal times, rest times, play times, and work times make life easier for every one!

Love

Horses love snuggles and kisses just as much as kids do.  It’s true!  Making time everyday to just love my kids the way they like to be loved is a top priority.  Showing a horse love could be back scratches, belly scratches, a good, grooming, or some hand grazing, they each have their own personality just like children.  My kids are cuddlers but all kids are different.

 

I feel that sometimes we make parenting so hard, we feel the need to follow some script.  Sometimes we miss the basics.  I relate to the horses because it was (and still is) my passion from an early age.  I have never felt more at home then in the company of the large beasts.  I felt no self doubt about the way a cared for them.  I never once wondered if I was going to ruin them for life.  I am working towards feeling that way about my children.

Have you ever compared your parenting to a hobby or job you love?

Just Being- Update #1 July 15, 2012

I am so thrilled to have had such a great response to Just Be With Me, so I thought I should update you on how it’s going.  So far things are going okay.  I wish I could say that everyone is peachy, there have been no tantrums (by children or adults) and that I am now Mom of the year… but that would be a lie.  I can say there have been far less moment of chaos,far less sad faces, and many more giggles.  I have been trying to get outside of my comfort zone and really play with my kids.  I have found a few thing that have made it easier to do that:

1. Plan ahead.  When I know will be headed to a park or some other fum place for most of the day I pack snacks, lunches, extra clothes, etc. the night before.  It eliminates the rush in the morning and helps me keep my cool.
2. Pick a schedule you can stick with.  For me it’s more of a list, I plan my day in three sections: Stuff I can do with the kids, stuff I need to do without the kids, and time just being with the kids. (More on this in a later post.)
3. Pick 3 chores a day.  That. Is. It.  My to do list gets super long and I’m sure yours does too.  I pick any 3 chores and do them in 1 day.  Mop floors, food shopping, make dinner- your 3 are done.
4. Take breaks.  If I worked 8 hours a day outside the home I would be required to take 2 15 minute breaks and an hour lunch.  Well I work 16 hour days at home!  Breaks NEED to be taken.  I get up early to workout and drink my coffee alone (most days.) I eat lunch at naptime so I get to enjoy my food while it’s hot.  Mid day the kids and I have started doing some stretching and wiggling to reduce stress.  AT least once a day I set them up with a quiet activity and I just sit for 5 minutes.
5. Make time with other adults.  Go on a date night.  Go shopping with a friend.  Join a group.  Go to a fitness class.  Find something you can do adults only.  We are lucky enough to have great neighbors (that also have teenage daughters for babysitting!!!) and we try to hang out with them at least twice a month.  It doesn’t have to be expensive or elaborate… sometime we just eat a late dinner at home after bed time and have a bonfire.

These are just my suggestions, and they are working well for me.  Do you have any tips?

Just Be With Me July 11, 2012

“Mama what you doing?” was not the sound I wanted to hear at 6:15 this morning when I was trying to get a jump on my batch cooking for this month.

“Making muffins buddy, and why are you…”

G interrupted before I could finish “Can I help?”

In this moment I wanted to say NOOOOOOO!!! Go back to bed.  I have so much to do.  I took a deep breath and said “Sure” instead and I am so happy I did.

I have been trying to take tips from fellow blogging Moms like Shawn and Rachael about living in the moment, being more peaceful and enjoying my children.  I had a horrible realization a few days ago that made me really rethink what I am doing as a parent.  I was trying to finish paying bills during naptime when G came down the stairs, he had been in bed for about 45 minutes and I needed him to sleep longer.  I commanded him to go back to bed, whiney and crying ensues and I start to yell.

“I just want you to read me a book Mom.”

“I just want you to rest so I can finish this chore.”

“How about I go get a book you can read to me?”

“Go get a book and read it in your bed.”

“I have to go poop”

“Well go”

Three minutes later G is crying because his pants got wet while he was going.  Now I am pissed.  Why did he have to pee on his pants?  I storm up the stairs escort him to his room and thrust a pair of clean clothes at him, all the while he is crying and apologizing.  Then. It. Hits. Me.  He is 3.  He isn’t doing this on purpose.  He just wanted to cuddle with a book.  Why didn’t I stop and read to him?  Was it so hard to pay bills later?  Why was I so ugly to him?  Why didn’t I help him to the potty?  Why was I such an awful Mother?  If you have never felt what I felt in that moment staring at my little boy, the boy that I would die for, I hope you never do.  I broke down in tears and scooped him up.  I held him and sobbed until he brushed back my hair and saw my tears.  “Don’t cry Mama, it’s going to be okay.”  My 3 year old is now comforting me.  What have I done to deserve such a gift?

We sat on his bed and talked.  I asked him what he wanted most from Mommy.  His answer “Just be with me.”  Four words that I needed to hear.  Four words that could not be anymore true.  Four words that I have repeated over and over in my head since he said them.

Why do I have such a hard time Just being with my children?  I’m not sure.  Maybe it’s because I love to be busy.  I love to multitask and I rarely work on one thing at a time.  Maybe it’s because I feel like my to do list is soooo long, I need to tackle it right now.  Maybe it’s because (I have never shared this before) I really don’t know how to play with my kids.  I don’t ever remember my mother or grandparents playing with me.  We lived on a block with only 1 other family with children and they were much younger than me, most of my time was spent with the horses or in front of the TV.

Making steps toward just being with them has been harder than I expected.  It will take time and patience, but I am reaping the rewards already.  This morning was filled with giggles while baking muffins and stirring soups.  They both loved playing with moon dough in the yard and I even joined in to see what the fuss was all about.  Now they are napping and I am finishing what I can of my batch cooking and thinking of more ways to connect with my children.

Have you ever had a moment like mine?

How did you go about making sure it doesn’t happen again?

Do you have a favorite blog about peaceful, calm, or in the moment parenting?